"Grades in school don't matter": mother prefers her son to treat others well rather than being a nerd

by Alison Forde

December 13, 2021

"Grades in school don't matter": mother prefers her son to treat others well rather than being a nerd

There are those who raise their children with the conviction that behavior towards others must come first of all from within the family, while there are those who are sure that for a good education there is a need for the important contribution of a good school system. Parents, which side would you take? Because today we want to leave you to the testimony of a mother who is strongly convinced that her child cannot necessarily be defined by his school grades. For her it is much more important that her little one is generous and respectful towards himself and others.

via Sprinkles in my Closet with Jenn Kish


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Here is what her mother Jenn Kish said in a Facebook post that went viral in a short time: "Today I did my math homework with my 10-year-old son. It took him almost an hour and he used four sheets of paper for notes. He solved each problem with intense concentration, and then, with a deep breath, made me check it. I quickly worked my way through the test and calculated his score. 'It's an 89' I told him,' This is a B. 'Immediately, his eyes filled with tears. He had done his best job, given his best efforts, and was still unhappy with the result. I looked at my son, then at the paper, and I tore it in half. 


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Jenn Kish continued: "My boy is great in the kitchen. He can cook a meal for the whole family without breaking a sweat. My kid is amazing at putting things together. He uses tools like a skilled craftsman. My son is a founding member of the mother / child debating team (I just made it up!). He can persuade me to do things I never thought he wanted to do. My boy is a sensitive soul. He is kind and diligent. He works on something until he feels it's the best he can do. My boy is NOT defined by the grade on his math test.

When I tore up that paper, I looked my boy in the eyes and told him how I saw him give his best, how he considered every problem and checked it until he felt he was finished. I've seen him erase and rework problems he wasn't sure about. I saw him pour every strength in his little body in that test, and told him I had never been prouder of him. Children are so much more than test scores, they are so much more than their reading level, they are so much more than the way we try to shape them.


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School is important, education is important, but it is not of the utmost importance. I'm more interested in how he treats others, his level of integrity, I'm more interested in his ability to learn how to use his talents to earn money for his family. I'm more interested in the person we're building than in math divisions. Our children should have the opportunity to show us where they excel, especially in the elementary school years.

I was shocked at the pressure he felt to get that test right. I never imagined the tears of disappointment that would fall. I admire his ambition and his desire to do everything right.

I've never so proud of an 89 in a math test!"

What do you think of this mom's words? Do you agree with her or do you disagree? Let us know in the comments!