Wife doesn't want her sick mother-in-law to come and live with them, but her husband won't listen to reason: "I won't abandon her in a hospice"

by Mark Bennett

December 09, 2022

Wife doesn't want her sick mother-in-law to come and live with them, but her husband won't listen to reason: "I won't abandon her in a hospice"
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Parents naturally take care of their children from their moment of birth, but there comes a certain point in life when these roles are reversed. Parents age and children grow up, having to take on the duty of looking after those who once changed their diapers, fed them and kept them safe. Unfortunately, with advancing age, the onset of disabling infirmities is much more probable, forcing children to take charge of their parents or getting them set up in a specialized institute. Between the feelings of guilt and being unable to have one's elderly parent at home, many families fall apart. The subject of this story does not know how to resolve an unpleasant situation which has arisen in her life: her husband would like his sick mother to move in with them. But his wife does not agree...

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Flickr / Not the actual photo / Iain Cuthbertson

Flickr / Not the actual photo / Iain Cuthbertson

Tenny is a mother who turned to the internet for advice. She explained that she has an elderly, very sick mother-in-law. In recent months, in fact, it seems that the woman's condition had definitely worsened, and her doctors have diagnosed her with senile dementia. In light of this diagnosis, Tenny's husband has decided bring his mother into his home, despite the fact that the family is not equipped to accommodate such an elderly person with such serious health issues. Tenny is very upset because both she and her husband work full-time and have 2 children to support: how are they going to take care of the elderly woman?

"I don't see how we can take care of his mother in the way we should. We are not social workers and I believe she needs fulltime professional care," Tenny wrote.

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Rawpixel / Not the actual photo

Rawpixel / Not the actual photo

Tenny suggested placing her mother-in-law in a suitable nursing home, where she can receive all the care she needs, but her husband refuses. Her husband, however, will not entertain this idea and, moreover, he promised his father that he would never, ever "abandon his mother". In short, the man does not want to consider any alternatives, even if the situation could seriously jeopardize his marriage and his family.

It's not easy to deal with situations like this, but what would you do? How would you deal with the situation? Write to us in the comments!

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