Mother reveals to her daughter that she hated being pregnant: "Was I wrong to tell her?"
Wishing to have a child and actually becoming pregnant involves some significant differences: one thing is the desire for motherhood, another is to deal with the pregnancy and all the negative symptoms that follow. There are women who hate this process, while others seem enthusiastic about it. There is no "right or wrong" in these cases, because it simply depends on different, subjective experiences, recounted by different people. One woman, for example, found herself in a bit of a quandary after confessing to her daughter - a 28-year-old young woman - that she hadn't gone through her pregnancy peacefully or happily. Her confession was not meant to imply that her daughter was unwanted, but that throughout the 9 months of the pregnancy, and the birth itself, had been particularly challenging for her. Her daughter, however, did not take this revelation very well.
It was at this moment that the mother revealed to her daughter how much she had hated her pregnancies: "It scared me and I was always anxious, and I didn't want any memories of those moments. The pregnancy and childbirth terrified me, even with her younger brother and after I had already gone through one experience having her. I also explained to her that I was very happy to see her so enthusiastic about her pregnancy because I didn't want her to feel like I had felt."
The mother's words, however, had the opposite effect on the young woman, who suddenly got quiet, said goodbye to her mother and left the home. A few hours later, the woman's son-in-law telephoned her, telling her that her daughter was very upset about the things she had said to her.
"Apparently I made her feel unwanted, like she was a burden to bear," said the mother, "I was shocked and horrified to hear these words, because it was exactly the opposite of how I felt and I said this to my son-in-law. I explained that I love my daughter (and her brother) very much and that I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. I didn't like being pregnant, but that doesn't mean my daughter wasn't a wanted child. My son-in-law said he understood, but he did alos say that my daughter is mad at me ".
What do you think about this? Did this mother do the right thing to tell her pregnant daughter about the feelings and experiences she had had when she went through her own pregnancies?