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Loving without possessing, accompanying…
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Loving without possessing, accompanying without oppressing, and bonding without creating dependence

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Love and possessiveness may seem to be obviously different concepts but seen from the inside, when you are involved in the first person, they have much more subtle borders than you think.

This is especially true at the beginning of a relationship when jealousy is mistaken for passion, but in the long run, such behavior only suffocates and kills affection.

Possession is a prison, true love sets us free.

image: Pxhere

Authentic feelings begin to die when the fear of losing someone is stronger than the simple desire to be with them. Possessiveness is a consequence of insecurity, of a profound sense of inadequacy that always makes one believe that one does not deserve the person that is by one's side.

Unfortunately, more often than not, instead of working on oneself trying to resolve one's inner conflicts, trying to understand the reason for those feelings of self-doubt, one reacts by intensifying control. As you can imagine this is the wrong way because it only gives the illusion of security and the superficial comfort of proprietorship.

You can keep your partner "in a cage", preventing them from running away or being with someone else, but you can never dominate their mind and their heart. To love means to accept an individual as they are, to let them be and to act, to let them leave and return, certain that wherever they may go, there will always exist an invisible and indissoluble thread of mutual respect and trust.

Today's society does nothing but help to generate and nourish emotionally immature people, capable only of satisfying their most superficial needs without ever going deep into themselves, to discover the true roots of a feeling. Attachment is just a surrogate for love, its most disturbing and fragile form, while true affection is strong and self-sustaining.

image: pexels

However, there are insecure individuals who even without creating "chains", still feel the need to receive continuous confirmation, but this ends up exhausting their partner, due to the fatigue of always having to give ineffectual reassurances.

Before you can love someone completely, you must love yourself and possess the self-esteem necessary to not be prey to childish fears. 

Only those who have totally resolved these issues can offer what they have without the fear that it will be misused or wasted while at the same time welcoming what they are given without the anxiety that it will be taken away from them.

Sincere love overcomes anything because, with this kind of love, two people continue to choose each other every single day.

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