"I love my daughter but I hate being a mother": the sincere words from this woman cause controversy - WTVideo.com
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"I love my daughter but I hate being…
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"I love my daughter but I hate being a mother": the sincere words from this woman cause controversy

May 25, 2021 • By Alison Forde

In today's society, women still live with the burden of having to conform to a single identity that portrays them as proud mothers of their children. But is it really so common to feel that desire for motherhood that, at some point, pushes you to make the decision to have a child? Let's just say that not all women experience this desire, but it seems that society is not yet ready to deal with it. If a woman doesn't want children, because she doesn't feel ready or for any other reason, that shouldn't be a problem. Writer Karla Tenório, 38, lived with a terrible sense of guilt for 10 years and only in 2017 managed to get rid of a burden that, unfortunately, created no small controversy: "I love my daughter, but I hate being a mother". Karla became a mother only to satisfy her husband's desire for paternity and, from the moment of her birth until today, she says she is repentant. But rest assured: she loves her daughter deeply, it's just that she doesn't enjoy motherhood in the same way as people often expect her too.

Karla Tenório is one of those women who, like so many others, can't stand the fact that anyone random stranger feels they can ask: "Well, then when will you have a child?"; no one should have the right to interfere so forcefully in the lives of others, with such personal requests, that they throw unparalleled social pressure on women. If a woman doesn't want to have children, is that a problem? Does Karla have to feel guilty about it? Karla has been silent about this thought for ten years, but this doesn't mean that she was okay with her role: from the moment of the birth, she would have liked to go back to before she was a mother and even in the following years, she always felt a sense of general malaise in fulfilling the role. One day, she met a group of women who thought exactly like her and, finally, she was able to better frame the situation. 

Karla loves her daughter deeply, there must be no doubt about this, but she hates being a mother, she hates the "classic idea of motherhood", according to which becoming a mother is the most beautiful thing in the world and dedicating one's entire existence to her children and their well-being is the only goal to be pursued. If, before she tended to feel guilty, now Karla has understood that being a mother and loving one's children are two different things and that there is nothing wrong with telling things as they are. Her testimony shines like a beacon of light for all those girls and women who feel obliged to have children but who, in reality, do not feel any maternal desire and would simply like to continue their life without children and without being made to feel guilty for it. 


What do you think, do you agree with the outlook of this mother? Let us know in the comments! 

Tags: WomenChildren Stories

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