Here are 6 good reasons to cut off all toxic family relationships and live peacefully!

by Shirley Marie Bradby

September 06, 2019

Here are 6 good reasons to cut off all toxic family relationships and live peacefully!
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The family is usually our refuge, our safe haven where we hope to always find comfort and understanding.

Whether it be our family by blood or family by choice, what we expect is always unconditional love, certainly not family members who bad-mouth us or engage in activities that damage or harm us.

However, unfortunately, it happens that some relationships with family members may become too toxic and harmful to our well-being.

In this case, it is a good idea to distance yourself and avoid interacting with those family members who actively and persistently try to make you feel bad.

via ScaryMommy

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Pxhere

When they judge you. In every family, openness and sincerity are required, and we expect our relatives to tell us negative things with frankness and honesty. Healthy criticism is a good thing because it helps us to look at ourselves from another perspective and to understand the mistakes we are making. However, if the criticism is repeated often and becomes an end in itself, then it is no longer useful or constructive: it only becomes oppressive and harmful.

When they gossip about you. In a family, there are often big or small secrets are that are very intimate that might involve asking for advice or also receiving a pat on the back for a good action. But, if your family members spread your confidential information to others, then, it is indeed, the case to avoid them or at least learn to keep your mouth shut as much as possible. No one, and even more so, whoever you think is close to you, has the right to tell your secrets to others whether they be big or small. Trust is the foundation of all healthy relationships.

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Monster in Law / Warner Bros

Monster in Law / Warner Bros

When they try to control you. In healthy relationships there is equality and one feels understood, supported, and respected. If instead, someone has control over you or tries to take control of your life and all your decisions, it means that there is a huge problem. If they try to make you a puppet, that they can manage at will, then they are definitely not the type of people you need in your life.

When they look for you only in time of need. Whoever calls you only when they need something, whoever seeks you out just for their own personal interest or gain is definitely not a person who really cares about you. This type of toxic family member only appears in your life when there is something that you have that can benefit them but the moment you need help they will disappear behind a thousand excuses!

BBC / Pride and Prejudic

BBC / Pride and Prejudic

When they make you feel powerless. There is a real manipulation technique called gaslighting which tends to make victims feel unqualified and incompetent. A family member who does this always tries to create fears and confusion within you, as well as questioning your sanity every time you try to make an important decision. When there are members of your family that make you feel like this, then, it is necessary to cut off all ties with them before they can seriously compromise your mental health.

When they keep reminding you of your past. In this situation, some family members continue to blame, criticize, and shame you for your past actions, especially the most painful and secret things as if they have the right to do so. They constantly confront you with the painful choices you have had to make and trivialize your pain and your memories - precisely, those memories that you would like to leave where they are - in the past.

Your family is certainly your family, but if a pact of mutual respect and trust is lacking, then, it is better to avoid them to defend and protect yourself. What do you think?

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