Why being alone but happy is probably better than being with someone who's not right for you

by Shirley Marie Bradby

December 19, 2018

Why being alone but happy is probably better than being with someone who's not right for you
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Today more than ever, the need to have someone by our side appears to be something absolutely essential, whether it be a partner or a friend.

This exhausting search for companionship can sometimes lead to having people around us who harm us emotionally and psychologically and upset our lives.

Often, you feel cannot do without them because you would feel uncomfortable and disoriented.

via Psychology Today

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These moods, however, are mainly due to the inner imbalances that we and those close to us live, especially if they are negative, and somehow reflect this condition of malaise. How can you feel good about others if you are not comfortable with yourself? It is impossible, in fact, this is why most of the time people convince themselves to be content with whoever is close to them, thinking that they do not deserve better. 

It is important, however, to try to find that inner peace that allows you to live your life more peacefully, and also with others. Stopping for a moment to reflect objectively on past experiences, helps us to see things in a different light and that is the first step towards a new contact with one's own ego.

The second step is to understand that self-realization comes first from oneself and then perhaps also from those who we decide to have by our side, but not vice versa. A healthy balance is obtained by giving the same importance to one's own self as you give to others.

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The third step is to rely on your own strength when it comes to improving different parts of your life, and not thinking that love can be the panacea for every problem. Things have to be adjusted a little at a time, each within its own time frame, and not all together. 

The fourth step is to realize that things have to take a different turn in one's life, and you must have a strong desire to rediscover that serenity and inner peace long since lost. It is only thanks to this awareness that the change that is needed can take place, starting with being able to recognize healthy relationships from those that are not.

How can you feel calm, if your sentimental relationships are not tranquil and positive? Once this is done, you have to work hard on yourself, on your own insecurities and uneasiness.

Of course, it is not a simple thing, but one step at a time you will realize that, within you, you have always had the strength to go beyond any barrier.

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